Trying to Find Myself

Sometimes it feels like i don't know myself anymore. Things around me just dont seem to be the way they used to be as well. It's really ahrd when you've become so out of touch with your innerself, that by the time you look inside you hardly recognize her...I've been battling with this feeling for sometime now because when i looked back in the past year, i don't know where the girl has gone...They say that when you arrived at this point in your life one of the best things to do is to distance yourself from all things familiar, and that is what i'm doing right now, if only for a few days. Here i am venturing out into the world that frightens me so much. Far away from my "confort zone" as what my former officemate says in her blog. Frankly, I'm not sure what i want to accomplish by coming here, i guess i just want to be away from my family and my loved ones even for a while, give myself some breathing space...and find myself. And by being far away, i hope for that one person to realize my importance in his life, want him to decide just what really is my place in hislife. Just maybe, by being far i can learn to live without him, the way he seems to be doing so easily where he is right now. I want to be free from pain, I just want to be HAPPY, truly HAPPY for a change. How i wish it wasn't so hard...